FROM CARL:

To commemorate her 69th birthday, actress Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of AARP.

One of the musical numbers she performed was "My Favorite Things" from "The Sound of Music."   She changed the words, a bit, to fit the occasion.

Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,

Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings.

Bundles of magazines tied up in strings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses, Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses, Pacemakers, Golf carts and porches with swings,

These are a few of my favorite things.

When the pipes leak, when the bones creak, when the knees go bad, I simply remember my favorite things and then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads and bunions,

No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,

Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,

These are a few of my favorite things.

Back pain, confused brains, and no need for sinnin'
Thin bone fractures and hair that is thinnin'.
And, we won't mention our short shrunken frames, when we remember our favorite things.

When the joints ache, when the hips break, when the eyes grow dim...then I remember the great life I've had  and then I don't feel so bad.