TIME

Scientists are developing a new clock that keeps time using just one single ion.  Now you ask, "what's an ion".  Well, it's an atom in which the electrons and protons are not equal in number which gives the atom a positive or negative electrical charge.  I'm sure most of you already knew that.

In any event, this clock is so accurate that it will lose a second, just once, in every few billion years.  With my busy retirement schedule, that's just what I need.