Most
of our generation were HOME SCHOOLED in many
ways.

 

1. My mother taught me TO
APPRECIATE A JOB WELL
DONE .
"If you're going to
kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me
RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the
carpet."

3. My father taught me about TIME
TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock
you into the middle of next week!"

4. My father taught me
LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's
why."

5. My mother taught me MORE
LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing
and break your neck, you're not going to the store with
me."

6. My mother taught me
FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case
you're in an accident."

7. My father taught me
IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry
about."

8. My mother taught me about the
science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut
your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about
CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of
your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about
STAMINA .
"You'll sit there until all
that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about
WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went
through it."

12. My mother taught me about
HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million
times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My father taught me the CIRCLE
OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take
you out.."

14.. My mother taught me about
BEHAVIOR
MODIFICATION .
"Stop
acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about
ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in
this world who don't have wonderful parents like you
do."

16. My mother taught me about
ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get
home."

17. My mother taught me about
RECEIVING .
"You are going
to get it from your father when you get
home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL
SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are
going to get stuck that way."

19. My mother taught me
ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you
are cold?"

20. My father taught me
HUMOR.
"When that lawn
mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to
me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO
BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you
don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow
up."

22. My mother taught me
GENETICS.
"You're just like your
father."

23. My mother taught me about my
ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were
born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me
WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll
understand.

 

25. My father taught me about
JUSTICE .

"One day
you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you !"